First of all, I want to make something abundantly clear. I have mostly given up on the Presidential election at this point. I am in a full state of mourning. I am literally in the grave. That is where you can find me. RIP. Here lies Sarah Kallies. She once believed in Democracy...
I have no plans to vote for either candidate at this point. And it’s not because I don’t care. If anything, I care too much. And believe me, I have heard all the reasoning as to why this is idiotic.
Guess what? Bye, Felicia. It’s my vote. I don’t care. Save your reasoning, I mean manipulation, for someone else.
I am a college educated individual that at one point considered Political Science and Law School. I have voted both sides of the aisle. I am just done. I refuse to pick the lesser of two monsters. If I have to write someone in, that’s what I intend to do.
Is it too late for Jon Stewart to run?
Secondly, if you cannot handle the language in this article then you and I agree. It’s crude and inappropriate. Completely. And I wish I was not writing it at all. My hands are actually shaking as I type. My eyes are filled with tears.
That being said, I am writing anyways, and not out of anger. I’m writing out of a sense of duty. For every pair of lips and breasts and every vagina that has ever been violated. Sorry if that offends anyone but apparently it needs to be said. In 2016.
In 1997, a man wanted to “grab my pu$$y,” too. He wanted to “just kiss me.” He “didn’t want to wait,” either. And he did just what he wanted.
These phrases were used by the man that is running for President. And while that bothers me, I am even more blown away by the public response of his supporters. People I know and love.
Let's put aside for a moment who said them. Just focus on the words. And then look at this overwhelming contingent of people who have backed this verbiage as "locker room banter."
Simple words. Just joking between guys right? Super casual. Nothing to get worked up about. Just guys being guys. This is how they are being defended.
It is this casual attitude that creates an atmosphere that causes SOME men to think that they can do what they want to women. And not just in the jovial imaginings of mens locker rooms. This is what innocently gives birth to the idea. That women are objects.
And slowly the lie grows. And before you know it, one of them is doing it in the privacy of a home. Doing it behind a bar dumpster. Doing it in a group at a Frat house. So maybe you aren't the doer but you have helped in creating the monster. Because if you are participating in this banter, guess what? You are part of the problem. THAT is rape culture.
Our words have power.
I was a college sophomore in a bikini on a cliffside overlooking the Mississippi River in St. Paul, Minnesota. And given the statistics I should not have survived, because this guy was naked except for a mask and he was twice my size. And somewhere, somehow, at some point in this man's life he developed the idea that women were objects. They were less than. It probably started as a joke. As part of an atmosphere. A culture. One that nearly killed me.
Do you know he actually stopped at one point during the assault and asked me if I wanted to f@#k? Those were the only words he uttered during the entire ordeal. As if it were a request or an offer. As if he were suddenly a gentleman. That I might suddenly find what was happening romantic. I was half naked on the edge of a cliff.
But somehow I survived, and with my lady parts in tact.
And I wished I hadn’t. I became an alcoholic and a drug addict and spent the next decade in shame wishing he had killed me. I even tried to take my own life the next year.
But now, every time I see a story about someone who didn’t survive or someone like the victim of Brock Turner, I feel this fire inside to speak up. To say, “Im alive. I’m here. He didn’t get me. And I have a purpose."
He may have “grabbed me” and stolen a massive part of my life, but he does not have me anymore. I have hope now. My hope is my faith. That is what I live for. And for every woman who is “grabbed” and too ashamed to say anything. Especially when that someone is rich and famous.
So today I was punched in the gut again and reminded that rape culture is alive and well. But ladies, you absolutely DO have the right to say no. Under any circumstance. Even if you are walking around in a bikini. Or naked, for that matter.
N O. No. That means they don’t get to touch you. Ever.
And the minute the rest of us do not stand up and say so, Loudly, we are saying this kind of speech, and therefore, behavior, is ok. And it’s not. Full stop. No excuses.
So please, let’s make sure that valuing women is also a part of what makes our nation great. All of a woman. Because this could be your mother, your sister, your daughter. Someone like me, that lost her dignity to someone who thought that taking what he wanted was ok. Or that even joking about it is ok. And it nearly destroyed me.
And no, “Sorry if anyone was offended,” is not enough if he actually did these things, which he eluded to. That makes him a criminal. And from what I gather, so is his habitually lying opponent.
So to both candidates, you both do not pass go. You both do not collect $200. You both go directly to jail.
How has this not happened yet?
I feel like I’m on crazy pills.